Yesterday marked 20 years since my maternal grandfather died. 20 years that somehow seem to have flown by without any of us realising it. I was a little pensive through the day and seemed to be lost in my own thoughts.
I was a 3 year old toddler when he died and I have absolutely no memories of time spent with him. Photos shown to me over the years and stories that I have heard, paint a picture in my mind, of a man who quite simply, loved life. My grandmother tells me stories of how she would spend a lot of time cooking because he always invited friends and family home. The house would always be filled with the sound of talking and laughter. My mother tells me of how much he adored me and how much he loved spending time with me.
A self-made person, who came to the city from his ancestral village to make a living, and made a good life for himself and his entire family. He was a simple man, but he loved the odd luxury. Someone who loved seeing the daughters of the house dressed up in traditional attire and loved to buy clothes and jewellery for the women in his life.
I look through old photographs of him carrying me in his arms and hoisted on his shoulder and I rack my brains for a slight memory that might surface somewhere, of a man that loved me so much. Try as I might, nothing surfaces and instead I resort to badgering people who knew and loved him, to tell me stories about him, and more specially, stories of how he used to play with me and take me out.
I miss him very dearly every day. And when I get married, or win my first case in court, or have a baby, I’m sure I’m going to think of him and miss him so much more. But what makes me smile is that I’m sure that somewhere he’s smiling down at me and he’s incredibly proud of me. And in some strange way, even looking out for me 🙂
It made me think of important memories are… especially to help you cope with the loss of a person you loved. I remember to be grateful for the people I have around me now, and I promise myself, that I will continue to create as many happy memories as possible… And if you’re reading this, I think you should make yourself that promise too 🙂