A letter to my Grandfather

My dearest Thatha,

I think this would be the first in a number of letters that I would write to you. Its been exactly 12 days since you left us and the last week has passed by in a blur. Except that you haven’t really left us, have you? The house still has your presence and every room holds such rich memories of you.

I see you when I look at myself in the mirror – when I notice my long nose that people say is yours. I see you in my sister’s sparkling wit and in my Appa’s helpful nature. I see baby photos of myself and I remember the new grandfather who was delighted to be behind the lens. Each time I get into my car, I will remember how we both went to the showroom to pick it out. I will remember how you always loved seeing me dressed up and telling me that I looked beautiful because, after all, “Whose grand daughter was I?” 🙂

I’ve learnt SO much from you, Thatha. You taught me to value people over money and that sometimes friendships are stronger than blood. You taught me that a soft reproach works better than a harsh scolding and that its absolutely acceptable for grandparents to cuddle and spoil their grandchildren. You taught me to nurture and treasure relationships and your own difficult life was often a reminder of how blessed we are today.

I will miss seeing your smiling face every morning and evening – your sulkiness if we left the house without giving you a kiss and a hug. I will miss curling up onto your lap, doing the crossword together, teasing you about your tv serial addiction. I will miss calling you up at the office and hearing you say, ‘Hello darling!’ on the phone. I will miss the Shakespeare buff, the English enthusiast, and the passionate teacher that you were. I want to remember you as a tall, fair, handsome man who loved me very very much. The coolest grandfather I could have ever imagined.

I always thought that your death would be a nightmare for all of us, but you died so peacefully in your sleep, exactly the way you always wanted it, so its difficult to be angry with God. We miss you SO much, but I want you to know that we are all doing alright.

You will live on in so many hearts and minds and you will continue to be a HUGE part of my life, wherever I am, because a part of you resides deep inside my heart. You’ve left us with your footprints to follow and your legacy to live upto and I promise you today that I’m going to make you very very very proud of me.

My dearest Thatha, my shining star, and now, my very own guardian angel… I love you very very much. Rest in peace.

 

 

Earlier posts:

The Circle of Life

Trying to grab hold of memories